Can you predict which marriages will survive? I asked.
“Sometimes,” he said. “If they’re communicating well, they have a good chance. If they have a similar belief system, similar values, they have a good chance.”
What about love?
“Love they should always have. But love changes.”
What do you mean?
“Love – the infatuation kind – ‘he’s so handsome, she’s so beautiful’ – that can shrivel. As soon as something goes wrong, that kind of love can fly out the window.
“On the other hand, a true love can enrich itself. It gets tested and grows stronger. Like in Fiddler on the Roof. You remember? When Teyve sings ‘Do You Love Me?’?”
I should have seen this coming. I think Fiddler on the Roof was pretty much the Reb’s worldview. Religion. Tradition. Community. And a husband and wife – Teyve and Golde – whose love is proven through action, not words.
“When she says, ‘How can you ask if I love you? Look at all I’ve done with you. What else would you call it?’
“That kind of love – the kind you realize you already have by the life you’ve created together – that’s the kind that lasts”.
(Have a Little Faith, Mitch Albom, page 143)